Anyway, after our hair appointments it was already 1:30 so we decided to go get Paige out of school a little early and spend the rest of the day at Disneyland.
This is one of my favorite things about homeschooling, I love how spontaneous your life can become. I'm trying to finagle a way to buy a RV so we can take off on trips and go explore when ever we want to. That, however, will not be happening until after we pay for our adoption.
Speaking of our upcoming adoption.....the referrals seems to be really pouring in the last few weeks. I'm pretty sure we won't get a referral until after the first of the year but it is really exciting to celebrate with all the other families.
I have been having some of the "normal" anxiety and doubts about this adoption lately. Will I feel an immediate connection to these children like I did my biological children? What will they think of me? Will they bond with there new siblings? I have been reading a lot and know all of these questions are normal. Ninety percent of the time I am excited and can't wait, and then there is the other ten percent when I worry and fret.
When I was pregnant with the other children I always had crazy dreams about my delivery. They were always awful. I would deliver and the doctor would hand me my baby. The baby was always a puppy or rabbit, etc. I was always so upset, insisting THIS WAS NOT MY BABY, but the people around me would insist it was and coo over how cute our new child was. I would wake up in a panic, crying and upset. This happened all five times I have had a baby.
Thankfully, each time I was handed an actual baby and not some furry creature after delivery.
The other night I was laying in bed with my doubts and fears, praying to God for them to go away. I drifted off to sleep and began to dream. Our entire family was in Ethiopia to pick up our little girl. We were all excited and sitting in a little room waiting for them to bring her in. A woman dressed like a nurse came in with this cute little bundle in her arms. She handed her to me. When I drew the blanket back there was a MONKEY inside. Dave and all the kids started oohing and ahhing over this cute monkey and I of course threw a fit and wanted to know where my daughter was. They all thought I was crazy and were so happy with there new little sister, I was not.
I woke up crying and upset just like I had the five times before. However, this time I smiled. Was this God's way of letting me know it was going to be OK? Things were not that different. He had our child/ren all picked out for us and they were the ones that were meant to be our children, just like the other five that we had been blessed with before.
I have never been more happy to give birth to a MONKEY. However, I warned my family that if we go to Ethiopia and they hand me a furry creature they better be just as upset as I am.
They, of course, think I am crazy. An assumption, I am pretty sure, the rest of us have already confirmed is true.